Friday, July 28, 2006

..........................................

"Dead End?????"

Hmmm... its cloudy day out there. Like me, cloudy...

I had (another) argument last night with my boyfriend. Like we always did recently... Or I think I had. I don't know whats happening with us, or with me for exactly. Its always me whining and complaining... I'm sorry, thats just me...

He said that I didnt trust him and "Lack of trust = Deadend!"
Maybe he start giving up on me now. But I haven't and I will never giving up on us...
Last night was not about trust. I just didnt know which one is true of what he said to me. Not about trust at all. Maybe he thought that way. I dont know.

It started by simple things. First he said he will try to call me, then he said he dont know if he will or not. When i said, "so you wont call me tonight?", he said that he dont have the phone card. Do you see what I mean here? First he said "a", then "b", then "c". Then I really didnt know which one is true, what he meant by all those sentences. If he knew he dont have the cards, why he said he would try to call me???

Well, sorry if I didnt get what he meant by those sentences, but it got me confused and felt like I'm in the middle of nowhere. And then he left...

Its not about who's to blame. Its not always guys fault but I could always take the blame too. I'm sorry if I did a mistake. I never afraid to admit that. Maybe its just that we really are lack of communication these days. We didnt talk as much as we used to. I dont want to have another arguments with him. Sometimes I didnt even know what we're arguing or fighting about. Thats just me, being selfish silly of me...

I miss him. I miss us.

I love you...

Thursday, July 27, 2006

Ten things I hate about you...

I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair. I hate the way you drive my car. I hate it when you stare. I hate your big dumb combat boots, and the way you read my mind. I hate you so much it makes me sick; it even makes me rhyme. I hate it, I hate the way you're always right. I hate it when you lie. I hate it when you make me laugh, even worse when you make me cry. I hate it that you're not around, and the fact that you didn't call. But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you. Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all. - "Ten Things I Hate About You"

Hmmm...

Phew, its so hot out there! And I dont really feel well either. Office still the the same, too many loud speaker everywhere. Cant I just have one day of peace???!!!

Oh gosh, I just realized that my shirt is smelly!!! and my hair too!!! Damn! It must be because I ate lunch there, smoky places. :( Now i have to spend the rest of the day smelling myself. I'll figure out to get rid of the smell later...

Hey honey, I know phone is expensive!!! I knew it ages ago!!! Why you just realize it now???
Anyway, I love you..... Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

working late...

Fuih... Today I finished a calculation for fixed asset depreciation! Fussy client! :) I wondered why they asked just the fiscal depreciation... Hmmm... Never mind! One down, millions to go... Lol...

Hey, my honey just created his own blog today. He said that i never told him that i have this blog!!! I told him millions of time! Well, not millions, but at least few times. He just never opened it. So honey, now you know that I have this blog for two years now! You'd better remember the address I gave you... Lol...

I listening this song, "If ever you're in my arms again" by Peabo Bryson. If i'm listening to this song, I will remember the first soap opera that played in Indonesia. Its called "Santa Barbara".

"If ever you're in my arms again, this time I love you much better...
If ever you're in my arms again, this time I love you forever...
This time will never end..."

Oh, I just have so much to do that makes me confuse what to do first!!! Damn!!
OK lets calm down... First thing first...

Got to go....